BLADE SILVER: COLOR ME SCARRED
Melody Carlson
Th1nk Books/NavPress
Fiction
ISBN: 1576835359
197 pages

Ruth Wallace is a ticking bomb --- not one that's liable to explode, but rather implode. Ever since her mom tried to commit suicide, Ruth's dad and his explosive (yet previously manageable) temper have grown to mountainous proportions. Trying as hard as she can, Ruth wracks her brain continually in an attempt to make certain that the household is running as smoothly as it did before her mom's breakdown. Ruth knows that even the most minor infractions of the house rules will send her father into a verbal rampage where he will further humiliate, degrade, and shame her.

As Ruth knows, there is no shelter to be found running to her mom for support. Dubbing her now depressed mother the Ghost Mom (since she only comes out of her room when there's no one else in sight), Ruth becomes increasingly angry and frustrated at her circumstances. Even her younger brother, Caleb, is no help. After one argument too many, he takes off to places unknown, leaving Ruth solely in charge of maintaining the home --- and taking the heat for Caleb's disappearance.

Feeling utterly alone and trapped, Ruth's only solace is to lock herself in the bathroom, carefully remove a razor blade she's hidden away so many times before that she's lost count, and begin cutting. Ruth, absorbed in the ritual, feels a measure of control every time she cuts. Following her carefully scripted routine, she watches the blood flow, stops the bleeding with a tissue, and then bandages the wound. For the moment, Ruth feels better --- until the next time she needs an escape from the pain, that is.

It isn't until the weather begins to warm and Ruth continues to wear long sleeve shirts that she realizes her cutting isn't going to stay a secret all summer. Fretting about how to stop the cycle causes Ruth increased stress, and only after a friend spots her scarred arms during a clothes shopping trip does Ruth begin to face her problem.

While there are no simple cures, she does find help from a school counselor who gets Ruth admitted to a home for teens with addictions. Overwhelmed and frightened (of the unknown and of her father's reaction), Ruth wants to back out at the last second, but doesn't. After four emotionally challenging weeks of counseling and support, Ruth finds the strength she needs to start over; though her journey will be tough, she's ready to let her inner and outer scars show so that her healing will be of the lasting sort.

As with each of the previous books in the TrueColors series, Melody Carlson addresses a frightening new trend with sensitivity while offering practical hope to hurting teens.

   --- Reviewed by Michele Howe

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